Saturday, May 02, 2009

Got to keep them in-line

So I had a little fun with one of the guys I work with. He is a Captain (O-3) who is from the AF Academy. He thinks he's pretty cool and we, along with two others sit about elbow to elbow on this row of plywood like desks. He keeps dropping his hat on my keyboard and then gets a little cranky when I put it on the hook behind his desk instead of throwing it on the ground! So I have asked him a few times to keep his crap to himself and he just doesn't get the point. He actually thinks it's funny and keeps moving more shit in my way so it gets to the point that I can't work until I clean up his empty water bottles and junk.

Today he gets up and tells me he is going to the gym. Now, I don't work for him and he doesn't work for me and we have COMPLETELY different jobs so I don't care what he is doing. He takes his hat out of his pocket and drops it right next to my keyboard again. So I say "Have a good time Captain" and watch him leave. I then pick up his hat and a zip lock bag and head to the restroom sinks. I wring his hat a few times with water and then put it in the freezer in the zip lock bag and put his name on the bag. Don't want anyone throwing it away, plus it would be funny as hell if someone would take it to him!

He comes back from the gym and asks for his hat. I say "not sure, where did you leave your hat?" "On my desk", I say "oh, I did see a hat on my keyboard and that might have been moved but I'm not sure past that." He gives me an evil look and I then leave for dinner. No sense sticking around to watch the tirade. He is getting upset as I leave because his buddies want to go grab some dinner and he doesn't have his hat!

I see him as my group is returning from chow and he has apparently grabbed someone else's hat. He insinuates that I may have something to do with his hat disappearing and I blow him off. As we keep walking my boss (a Guard AF 0-3) asks what I did with the hat and I tell her. She laughs and he hears her laughing at him. This probably didn't help what VERY LITTLE deny-ability I had.

He gets back from chow and doesn't say a word to me but amazingly is giving me the 2 inches of space I need to do my job. After a few hours I am at my bosses desk talking about something and I see him stomping around and he glares at me and I then hear one of the refrigerators open and close. He walks by again glaring and then another fridge opens and closes (it's actually in a freezer away from my work section because it's stupid to leave it so close to yourself). Then he leaves the area. I go back to my desk eventually and he is sitting there and says "Did you freeze my hat Sergeant?", "Again sir, I don't know exactly what you are talking about." "The hat that I left on your desk, did you do something with it?" "Ohhh, that hat! Yes, I figured you wanted to give me a gift and I didn't want anyone to steal my new gift so I placed it in a safe place. Did you find it and take it back since I don't want it?" "YES" "Okay good then" "Did you do this because I left it on your desk" "Well sir, if it's on my desk it must be mine right?" "okay, I give you win!" "That's very big of you sir".

We had a nicer talk a little while later and I explained that I'm not a bad guy, but I am a Maintainer at heart and if you want to play games and be a prick then I will treat you like a prick and you won't enjoy your time here. I know WAY too many gags and cheap tricks (zip tie your shirt to your chair and such). His predecessor was a good guy and we had a good time, but this guy just pissed me off from day one. I am sure he has had some NCO's tell him not to be playing those games because he can't win but I think he forgot it already. We have less to lose and get in far less trouble than officers do so we will win every battle!

Anyway, that was my entertainment for today. Nothing super exciting but still enjoyable to me!


  1. Very funny! I love it!

  2. Anonymous10:43 PM

    I haven't had time to check into the blog for a while and I have to say this was a great story to start out with. You are a riot!!~Love Mom~

  3. I love practical jokes (when done on other people) and this one was hilarious! Especially since the guy had it coming. Go Dave!

  4. And that is why you and Bryan get along so well... I must share that story with him... when i am done crying from laughing so hard!!!!